Tuesday, 28 February 2017

How To Get And Keep A GOOD Man?

I literally receive tones of emails every single day from different women world wide asking me this very same question: "what was your strategy to get & keep a good man that treats you even better?".

So I decided to finally share some few little things I have picked up from my experience and my personal journey.
 
First of all,forget everyone who told you that you need to master a million and one psychological game & tactic (abi strategy) of seduction that we get to hear about in magazines,movies and novels. Trust me it's not THAT stressful.

Secondly,you'll might think that you need to be "to the book" to get and keep a correct man by your side. That is why so many women all over the world would literally break their neck cleaning and cooking and acting holier than thou just to prove a guy how much of a good catch they are.
 

Do you want to know how you look like in that process?
 

It's like you wrote on your forehead "I am a wife material,PLEASE,I BEG YOU take me seriously,APPROVE MY WORTH PLEASE!".
I swear down.
 

But I would have to disappoint you : It's also not about forcefully ,desperately trying to fit in a definition of an "ideal woman" society constantly force on us. Desperate tries to appear "perfect" is not what will help you get appreciated,respected,loved,cherished as a woman and treated as a queen on a daily basis.
It might sound silly to you,but the best way to get yourself a good man that will,most importantly accept you and love you for who you are ,is to simply appear as raw,unpackaged YOU. True you. Imperfect you. 
 
The only way you will get to see which man is really worth of getting the best of you is the one who is willing to deal with the worst in you at the first place. Trust me there is no better or more valid way to "select" men  you come across and make the right choice later on.  A man who would rather focus on your beauty,goodness,qualities then  your flaws is the man that will treat you good and appreciate you in every way.
 

The reason why we hold ourselves of being who we truly are in front of the person we want to impress is because we are afraid of  chasing that person away which automatically means we don't consider ourselves good or worthy enough. 

And men can sense it. Women too.
It smells of desperation,fear and self pity.
And trust me guys,there is no bigger turn off than that.

That way you will spend your life in misery and taken for granted by the person that should cherish you the most.But let's be real: Isn't it selfish to expect from other person to recognize your worth and value if you can't see it yourself?

The sexist,the most appealing and the most irresistible woman is not the one who is the most perfect (in any way). It is the one who has nothing to prove because she IS SURE of her worth,value and that is why she was not only able to make a peace with her past but able to embrace it as well knowing that she is not her mistakes and for that same reason she is not afraid of being misjudged or disliked,and that gives her freedom and power be real.


FORGET ALL THE SOCIAL AND TRADITIONAL NORMS AND STOP TRYING TO FIT IN.
Trust me,you don't want to be among those desperate women who are trapped in unhappy marriages every day trying to be something they are not so they can meet their partners ideals and expectations they decided to start with to get "verified"at the first place. (I know you see such cases everywhere you go.) 

The bottomline is : if you want to have a UNION BASED ON LOVE (not interest or any other benefit) you need to understand that Love must be effortless and smooth,and definitely   SHAMELESS and FREE! If you must force it on someone by hiding things about your character,habits or past,then it's not for you! 

Stop trying so hard to appear as a Saint to impress a common sinner.



You are amazing enough to be loved for who you are and if someone is not capable of doing such,then the person is simply not meant for you.


Written By Sonia Ogbonna....

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